When Shooting Stars Fall: Chapter 3
03 | Collision
The forecast clearly said it'd be sunny, yet it still pours heavily in the afternoon. The raindrops cling to the window panes, and outside the window is a hazy, gray scene reflecting a blurred block of color.
The fragrance of flowers in botany class makes people drowsy. I depressingly look at the empty ground beside my desk, and remember that I left my umbrella in the dormitory. So I tear up a piece of homework, and begin complaining bitterly on it:
>A< So annoying, it actually rained today, I didn't bring my umbrella, did you?
I tear the paper into yet another strip, crumpling it up, waiting for the teacher to turn back around before firmly tossing it onto Xavier's desk. I only hear two swishes, and quickly receive his response passed forwards.
Ever since that night under the stained glass window in the auditorium, it seems something has changed between Xavier and me, yet on the surface, everything stays the same. He is still being "protected" and leaves the classroom on time every day when the school bell rings, and we have no other interactions.
It's just that I will sometimes pretend I'm careless and walk into that encirclement, quietly give him a wave and say goodbye. He'd also poke my back occasionally, and share an earbud with me, or pass notes to one another, just like today—
However, just as I am about to open the note sent back by Xavier, it unexpectedly is snatched away by a hand. I raise my head, and see an angry glare on the teacher's face. Then the classroom falls into a deathly silence, as if waiting for a rainstorm to descend. Fortunately, he just confiscates my note, and punishes me by making me stay to clean the classroom tonight.
The rainstorm continues to fall from afternoon to evening, with no sign of stopping.
After my classmates leave the classroom one by one, I put away the plants on the desk and stand up, ready to begin my task, starting with cleaning the desks and chairs. As I turn around, I find Xavier sitting leisurely on a chair. I can’t help wiping my eyes, wondering what special day it could possibly be today.
“You can’t have stayed behind to help me clean the classroom, right?”
Xavier shakes his head, and then takes an umbrella out from the side pocket of his bag, placing it on the desk before my eyes.
“It was to tell you, I brought an umbrella.”
I recall the paper note the teacher confiscated this afternoon, the answer left on it had only been half revealed. I am stunned for a moment.
“But those people who are always around you…” I suddenly recall another thing, and face towards the window. “Are they just standing outside the window staring at us right now?”
“It's possible.” Xavier says lightly, and then opens one of his hands, converging all the light in the room into the palm of his hand, gently turning the room into darkness.
“This way they won't be able to see.”
The sky was already hazy and gray, and now there is an even gloomier atmosphere. I pretend to look calm as I turn away, muttering softly:
“But it's so dark, there's no way to clean up.”
“Are you waiting for the rain to stop?”
Xavier holds a piece of cloth in his hand, leaning against the classroom door and looking at me.
I immediately come back to my senses, running to his side.
Thanks to Xavier’s help, the classroom quickly gets cleaned up. I return the tools, while he stands on the stone steps at the entrance of the building, looking like he is idling his time away. Just as he sees me walk over, he opens his umbrella: "Let's go.”
Xavier and I hide under the same umbrella, as if the storm outside has nothing to do with us. Listening to me spill out my previous impression of him, I clearly catch the smile on the corner of his lips.
“Xavier, I've discovered after meeting me, your smile seems to really be .”
“...Shouldn't this sort of thing be said by other people?”
“Alright.” I say, still unwilling to admit defeat, continuing to walk forwards with him.
Of all times, right in the middle of the tacit silence between the two of us, I hear a gurgling sound, my stomach rumbling. I look at Xavier first, and he looks back at me blankly, and then his eyes curve:
“Want to go get something to eat?”
“But it's already so late now… can you?”
I scan our surroundings, constantly feeling like countless eyes are hiding in the dark night. Facing Xavier, he seems to hesitate for a few seconds, then adjusts the angle of the umbrella in an instant, completely covering the two of us—his pace speeds up, so I follow him, walking faster and faster, practically running in the end.
Shaking off those pairs of eyes, Xavier and I stand under the eaves of a roadside house, eating bread while watching the rain that still looks unending.
I take a bite of bread, boredly observing Xavier beside me, before finally turning my gaze to the sword behind him.
“Xavier, can I take a look at your sword?”
He’s a little confused, but he still pulls the sword out from its sheath for me. I suddenly feel a little nervous, wiping my hands on the edge of my shirt, then taking it from him with both hands.
I reach my hand out, rubbing along the wooden sword once, gaining a sense of satisfaction as my fingers run over every crevice.
Wooden swords aren't sharpened, Xavier’s sword is the same. Although both deep and shallow marks are on it, and you can tell the marks are years old at a glance, anyone can tell that the material of this sword is unusual.
“Xavier, why do you like training so much? Every day during swordsmanship class, I see you training from beginning to end, and you’re always carrying this sword…”
“It doesn't count as it.” Xavier folds up the empty bread wrapper. “Since I was young, practicing swordsmanship was the only thing I did that was outstanding.”
I turn to him and give him a puzzled look, waiting for his next words, but he abruptly stops talking. Instead, he glances at me and changes the subject: "The meteor shower you mentioned, when is it happening?"
“Next week. How come? Are you able to go with me?”
I face Xavier with anticipation and hope, watching him thinking in silence, seeming a little hesitant. But very quickly, his expression suddenly freezes. My head raises to follow his gaze, the smile frozen on my face—
A group of familiar people stood at the stairs in front of the eaves. They just stare at Xavier, not saying a word, yet I can clearly tell their intentions.
In an instance, the curtain of rain silently divides the two sides into opposing camps.
I look towards Xavier, he's just standing there, staring at the people before his eyes. There's a stalemate between the two parties, and a feeling like it's ready to collapse any moment.
Finally, after a long silence, he compromises. He hands me the umbrella still dripping with water, then turns around and follows them into the rainy night.
I only began to fully understand the meaning after a long time.
If wishing on a shooting star really works, then I wish my body could be healthy.
Perhaps this would let me wait until the next one hundred years, and watch that meteor shower with Xavier.
03 | Collision
The forecast clearly said it'd be sunny, yet it still pours heavily in the afternoon. The raindrops cling to the window panes, and outside the window is a hazy, gray scene reflecting a blurred block of color.
The fragrance of flowers in botany class makes people drowsy. I depressingly look at the empty ground beside my desk, and remember that I left my umbrella in the dormitory. So I tear up a piece of homework, and begin complaining bitterly on it:
>A< So annoying, it actually rained today, I didn't bring my umbrella, did you?
I tear the paper into yet another strip, crumpling it up, waiting for the teacher to turn back around before firmly tossing it onto Shen Xinghui's desk. I only hear two swishes, and quickly receive his response passed forwards.
Ever since that night under the stained glass window in the auditorium, it seems something has changed between Shen Xinghui and me, yet on the surface, everything stays the same. He is still being "protected" and leaves the classroom on time every day when the school bell rings, and we have no other interactions.
It's just that I will sometimes pretend I'm careless and walk into that encirclement, quietly give him a wave and say goodbye. He'd also poke my back occasionally, and share an earbud with me, or pass notes to one another, just like today—
However, just as I am about to open the note sent back by Shen Xinghui, it unexpectedly is snatched away by a hand. I raise my head, and see an angry glare on the teacher's face. Then the classroom falls into a deathly silence, as if waiting for a rainstorm to descend. Fortunately, he just confiscates my note, and punishes me by making me stay to clean the classroom tonight.
The rainstorm continues to fall from afternoon to evening, with no sign of stopping.
After my classmates leave the classroom one by one, I put away the plants on the desk and stand up, ready to begin my task, starting with cleaning the desks and chairs. As I turn around, I find Shen Xinghui sitting leisurely on a chair. I can’t help wiping my eyes, wondering what special day it could possibly be today.
“You can’t have stayed behind to help me clean the classroom, right?”
Shen Xinghui shakes his head, and then takes an umbrella out from the side pocket of his bag, placing it on the desk before my eyes.
“It was to tell you, I brought an umbrella.”
I recall the paper note the teacher confiscated this afternoon, the answer left on it had only been half revealed. I am stunned for a moment.
“But those people who are always around you…” I suddenly recall another thing, and face towards the window. “Are they just standing outside the window staring at us right now?”
“It's possible.” Shen Xinghui says lightly, and then opens one of his hands, converging all the light in the room into the palm of his hand, gently turning the room into darkness.
“This way they won't be able to see.”
The sky was already hazy and gray, and now there is an even gloomier atmosphere. I pretend to look calm as I turn away, muttering softly:
“But it's so dark, there's no way to clean up.”
“Are you waiting for the rain to stop?”
Shen Xinghui holds a piece of cloth in his hand, leaning against the classroom door and looking at me.
I immediately come back to my senses, running to his side.
Thanks to Shen Xinghui’s help, the classroom quickly gets cleaned up. I return the tools, while he stands on the stone steps at the entrance of the building, looking like he is idling his time away. Just as he sees me walk over, he opens his umbrella: "Let's go.”
Shen Xinghui and I hide under the same umbrella, as if the storm outside has nothing to do with us. Listening to me spill out my previous impression of him, I clearly catch the smile on the corner of his lips.
“Shen Xinghui, I've discovered after meeting me, your smile seems to really be .”
“...Shouldn't this sort of thing be said by other people?”
“Alright.” I say, still unwilling to admit defeat, continuing to walk forwards with him.
Of all times, right in the middle of the tacit silence between the two of us, I hear a gurgling sound, my stomach rumbling. I look at Shen Xinghui first, and he looks back at me blankly, and then his eyes curve:
“Want to go get something to eat?”
“But it's already so late now… can you?”
I scan our surroundings, constantly feeling like countless eyes are hiding in the dark night. Facing Shen Xinghui, he seems to hesitate for a few seconds, then adjusts the angle of the umbrella in an instant, completely covering the two of us—his pace speeds up, so I follow him, walking faster and faster, practically running in the end.
Shaking off those pairs of eyes, Shen Xinghui and I stand under the eaves of a roadside house, eating bread while watching the rain that still looks unending.
I take a bite of bread, boredly observing Shen Xinghui beside me, before finally turning my gaze to the sword behind him.
“Shen Xinghui, can I take a look at your sword?”
He’s a little confused, but he still pulls the sword out from its sheath for me. I suddenly feel a little nervous, wiping my hands on the edge of my shirt, then taking it from him with both hands.
I reach my hand out, rubbing along the wooden sword once, gaining a sense of satisfaction as my fingers run over every crevice.
Wooden swords aren't sharpened, Shen Xinghui's sword is the same. Although both deep and shallow marks are on it, and you can tell the marks are years old at a glance, anyone can tell that the material of this sword is unusual.
“Shen Xinghui, why do you like training so much? Every day during swordsmanship class, I see you training from beginning to end, and you’re always carrying this sword…”
“It doesn't count as it.” Shen Xinghui folds up the empty bread wrapper. “Since I was young, practicing swordsmanship was the only thing I did that was outstanding.”
I turn to him and give him a puzzled look, waiting for his next words, but he abruptly stops talking. Instead, he glances at me and changes the subject: "The meteor shower you mentioned, when is it happening?"
“Next week. How come? Are you able to go with me?”
I face Shen Xinghui with anticipation and hope, watching him thinking in silence, seeming a little hesitant. But very quickly, his expression suddenly freezes. My head raises to follow his gaze, the smile frozen on my face—
A group of familiar people stood at the stairs in front of the eaves. They just stare at Shen Xinghui, not saying a word, yet I can clearly tell their intentions.
In an instance, the curtain of rain silently divides the two sides into opposing camps.
I look towards Shen Xinghui, he's just standing there, staring at the people before his eyes. There's a stalemate between the two parties, and a feeling like it's ready to collapse any moment.
Finally, after a long silence, he compromises. He hands me the umbrella still dripping with water, then turns around and follows them into the rainy night.
I only began to fully understand the meaning after a long time.
If wishing on a shooting star really works, then I wish my body could be healthy.
Perhaps this would let me wait until the next one hundred years, and watch that meteor shower with Shen Xinghui.
03 | Collision
The weather forecast says it's going to be a clear day today, but there's only heavy rain in the afternoon. Fat water droplets cling to glass windows, blurring the gray outdoors into blobs of color.
I glance at the empty space by my desk, recalling I left my umbrella in my dorm. The fragrance of flowers in the botany lecture hall is slowly putting me to sleep. I tear off a piece of paper to write my sorrows.
">A< Ugh, it's so annoying. I can't believe it's raining. I also didn't bring my umbrella today. What about you?"
I tear the paper, scrunch it into a ball, and then throw it at Xavier's desk when the teacher isn't looking. I hear two swishes before receiving his reply.
Ever since that night, something changed between me and Xavier. At first glance, everything remains the same. He's still being "protected" and leaves school right when the bell rings. We don't have any interactions outside of school, either.
It's just I sometimes "carelessly" walk into those "people," and then wave goodbye to him. He'd also sometimes poke me in the back and give me one of his earbuds. Or we'd slip notes to each other in class, just like today.
However, just as I am about to look at Xavier's note, a hand snatches it away. I look up to find the teacher staring angrily at me. The classroom becomes quiet, waiting with bated breath. Luckily, he just took my note and told me to be on clean-up duty later.
The rain falls from afternoon to evening with no signs of stopping.
Watching my classmates leave one after another, I pack my things and get ready to start my clean-up duties with the desks and chairs. When I turn around, I notice Xavier sitting at his desk. I rub my eyes, wondering if today is a special day.
“Did you stay behind to help me clean up?”
Xavier shakes his head and takes out an umbrella from his bag, placing it on the table in front of me.
“I stayed to tell you that I brought an umbrella.”
I recall the note the teacher took from me with its half-revealed answer, and stand there like an idiot.
“But those people…” I look out the window in panic. “They’re going to be watching us, right?!”
“Maybe,” Xavier says. He opens his hand, and all the light in the room gathers onto his palm.
“Now they won't be able to see anything.”
Under an already gloomy sky, the lack of a light source makes everything more dim, secretive. I try to appear calm as I look away.
“But now it’s too dark to clean up.”
“Are you waiting for the rain to stop?”
Xavier holds a towel, watching me from the classroom doorway.
I come back to my senses and run to him.
With Xavier’s help, my work gets done in no time. After I put away the cleaning supplies, I find him idling on the stone steps in front of the building. Seeing me approach, he opens his umbrella and says, “Let’s go.”
Under the umbrella, it’s almost as if the storm outside has nothing to do with us. While Xavier listens to me ramble on about the impression I had of him, I notice the corner of his mouth curling up.
“You’re smiling a lot more since we’ve met, Xavier.”
“...Shouldn’t you have heard that from other people already?”
“Fine, suit yourself!” I huff, continuing to walk alongside him.
And of course, when silence falls between the two of us, my stomach lets out a loud, long groan. I look at Xavier immediately. He looks back at me with a blank stare. Then, there is mirth in his eyes.
“Do you want something to eat?”
"But it's so late now... Are you allowed to?"
I scan our surroundings, getting the feeling of being watched by countless eyes in the dark. Looking back at Xavier, he hesitates for a few seconds before he adjusts his grip on the umbrella, shielding us completely from view. He hurries, so I walk faster to catch up with him. We almost end up running.
When we leave those gazes behind, Xavier and I stand under the shade on the side of the street. We eat bread as we watch the endless rain.
I take a bite out of my bread and glance at Xavier, my gaze eventually landing on the sword on his back.
"Xavier, can I look at your sword?"
He's a little confused, but he still takes his sword out of its sheath and hands it to me. All of a sudden, I feel nervous. I wipe both my hands on my shirt and take it from him.
I run my hand along the wooden sword, feeling every groove beneath my fingertips.
Wooden swords aren't sharpened, and Xavier's isn't any different. Even though there are countless marks from wear and tear, anyone can see that the quality of this sword is beyond average.
"Xavier, why do you like to train so much? You rarely take breaks when you train, and you're always carrying a sword around..."
"It's not that I like it." Xavier throws the empty wrapper into the trash. "It's the only thing I've been good at since I was a child."
I give him a confused look, waiting for him to continue, but he doesn't keep talking. Instead, with a glimmer in his eyes, he changes the subject. "When did you say the meteor shower was?"
"Next week. Why? Do you want to come with me?"
I look up at Xavier with hope in my eyes, watching him stand there in silence. He seems hesitant, but within seconds, his expression stiffens. I follow his gaze, my smile fading from my face.
A group of familiar men are standing there with us under the shade. They say nothing, but their intentions are clear.
Like a wall, the heavy rain is going to separate us.
I look at Xavier, but he just stands there, staring at them. The tension between us continues to crumble, ready to collapse at any given moment.
Finally, after a long silence, he gives in. As the rain falls on him, Xavier hands me the still-dripping umbrella and leaves with them.
Later, I asked Xavier what would happen if he didn't leave that night. He thinks about it, and then says to reach for freedom is to give it up.
It took me a long time to understand what he meant.
If wishing on a star does make your wish come true, then I wish I could be healthy.
Then I can wait another hundred years to watch the meteor shower with Xavier.
03 | 碰撞
明明预报说是晴天，下午却还是忽降暴雨。雨珠挂在玻璃上，将窗外灰蒙蒙的景象映成了模糊的色块。
植物课教室内的花香熏得人昏昏欲睡，我郁闷地看了一眼课桌边空荡荡的地面，想起自己把雨伞落在了宿舍，便撕了一张作业纸，在上面大吐苦水：
> A < 好烦，今天竟然下雨了，我没带伞，你呢？
我将纸又撕成条状，揉成纸团，瞄准老师回过头，扎扎实实地扔在沈星回的桌上。只听后面刷刷两声，我很快收到了向前传来的回应。
自从礼堂花窗下的那一晚之后，我和沈星回之间好像发生了变化，但表面上还是一如往常。他仍旧被“保护”着，每天准时踩着放学的钟声离开教室，我们也没有其他的交集。
只是我有时候会假装不当心地走进那个包围圈，然后悄悄地和他挥手说再见。他也偶尔会戳戳我的背后，给我分享一只耳机，又或者互相传纸条，像今天一样——
只不过，正当我一心准备打开沈星回传来的纸条时，却没想到被一只手夺了过去。我抬头一看，正是老师怒目圆睁的脸。而后课堂死一般的寂静，等待着暴风雨的降临。所幸他最后只是没收了我的纸条，罚我今晚留下来打扫教室。
暴雨一路从下午降到傍晚，丝毫没有减弱的势头。
待同学一个个都离开教室，我便收拾好桌上花草起身，准备从清理桌椅开始我的工作。正当回头的时候，却发现沈星回竟悠闲地坐在椅子上。我忍不住擦了擦眼睛，暗道今天到底是什么特殊日子。
“你留下来，不会是为了帮我一起打扫教室的吧？”
沈星回摇摇头，而后从书包侧袋里摸出一把伞，放到我眼前的课桌上：
“为了告诉你，我带伞了。”
我想起下午被老师没收的那张纸条，上面还留着半截还未揭晓的答案，不由得愣了一下。
“可是你身边的那些人……”我突然又想起了什么，望向窗外，“这时候不会正在窗外盯着我们吧？”
“有可能。”沈星回淡淡吐出一句话，而后一只手张开，屋内所有的光汇向他的掌心，随着他的轻轻一握暗了下去。
“这样就看不到了。”
本来就灰蒙蒙的天，现在又多了些昏幽的气氛。我故作镇定地转开脸，轻声嘀咕：
“但这么暗，也没法打扫了。”
“你在等雨停吗？”
沈星回手里拎着块布，靠在教室的门上看着我。
我立刻回过神来，跑去他身边。
多亏了沈星回的帮忙，教室很快便打扫完了。我归还完工具，他正站在楼门口的石阶上，一副无所事事的样子。见我走过来，才撑开雨伞：“走吧。”
我和沈星回躲在同一把伞下，仿佛外面的狂风暴雨都与我们无关。听着我倾诉自己以前对沈星回的印象，我清晰地捕捉到他唇角的笑意。
“沈星回，我发现你认识我之后笑容好像真的变多了。”
“……这种事难道不应该由别人说？”
“好吧。”我不服地应了声，继续和他一起朝前走。
偏偏在两人默契的沉默中，只听“咕——”的一声，我的肚子不争气地响了。我第一时间看向沈星回，他茫然地看了我一眼，而后眼睛弯起来：
“要不要去吃点东西？”
“可是现在已经很晚了……你可以吗？”
我瞥了一眼四周，总感觉暗夜里藏着无数只眼睛。望向沈星回，他像是犹豫了几秒，然后瞬间调整了伞的角度，让它彻底地遮住我们两个人——他加快脚步，于是我跟着他越走越快，最后几乎都要跑起来。
甩开了那几双眼睛，我和沈星回站在路边屋檐下，一边吃着面包一边看着这依旧不见停的雨势。
我咬了口面包，无聊地观察着身旁的沈星回，最后将目光投向他身后的剑：
“沈星回，我能不能看看你的剑？”
他有点疑惑，但还是从剑鞘里抽出剑递给我。我突然有点紧张，用手在衣角上抹了抹，然后双手接过。
我伸出手，在木剑上蹭了一把，然后满足地用手指感受它的每一道豁口。
木剑是不开刃的，沈星回的这把也一样。虽然上面留下深深浅浅的道口，一看就是岁月的痕迹，但任谁都能识别得出这把木剑的材质不一般。
“沈星回，你为什么这么喜欢练剑？每次剑术课都能看你从头练到尾，身上也总是背着剑……”
“也不算很喜欢。”沈星回将空了的面包袋随手叠起，“练剑，是我小时候唯一能做的出格的事。”
我向他投去疑惑的目光，等待着下文，但他的话就此戛然而止。反倒眼睛一瞥，换了个话题抛给了我：“你之前说那场流星雨什么时候来？”
“下周。怎么了？你可以跟我一起去了？”
我期待地望向沈星回，看着他沉默了一会儿，像是有点犹豫。但很快，他脸上的表情僵住了。我顺着他的目光抬起头，笑容也停滞在了脸上——
屋檐前的阶梯下站着一群熟悉的人，他们只盯着沈星回，不开口，我却能明确地知道他们的意图。
顿时，雨幕无声地将两边分割成了阵营。
我看向沈星回，他只是站在原地，盯着眼前的人。两方之间的僵持，感觉随时都要崩盘。
终于，长久的沉默过后，他妥协了。他将那把还淌着水的伞递给我，然后跟着他们转身走进了雨夜。
后来我问过沈星回，如果那天他不走会怎么样。他想了想，告诉我追求自由就是放弃自由。
我很久之后才明白这个含义。
如果向流星许愿真的能灵验，那我希望身体能够健康。
或许这样我就能等到下一个百年，和沈星回看那场流星了。
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